Holidays from Hell
by Vronna
Summary: Soon after the Ring Conflict Tsuna is called to Italy by his father. The reason for that call turns out to be no one else but Xanxus. And this where the trouble only begin. Tsuna X Xanxus X27.
1. Chapter 1

**Holidays from Hell**

**_Author's note_**

I've been stalking ff for a long time but it's my first time publishing something here. Sorry, if there are some mistakes. English is not my first language but I'm trying my best. Oh, and I love X27 to death.

* * *

Tsuna woke up and slowly rubbed his eyes. Yesterday Reborn announced that starting tomorrow his "special training" would begin, so he was surprised that his sadistic tutor didn't even try to use "traditional Vongola's method" to pull him out of the bed.. The boy was anything but happy about it, especially that his holidays had just started. He yawned and headed towards the kitchen. "Good morning, mom. What is for breakfast today?"

His mother smiled happily as soon as she saw her no-good son. "Good morning Tsu-kun! We have rice omelette for breakfast today! But you have to hurry with eating it! Your plane is leaving in two hours!"

Tsuna looked at his mother surprised. "My plane? What are you talking about, mother?"

Reborn, who was being fed omelette by Bianchi, paused to smile at Tsuna. "Didn't I tell you about it yesterday? Iemitsu wants to see you, so you're flying to Italy."

"You've only told me that'll have the special training! And what does my no-good father want from me, anyway!"

"Don't say rude things about your father Tsu-kun! He just wants you to help him with his job. I've already packed your things, so you don't have to worry about anything. Eat your breakfast before it gets cold."

Tsuna sighed and sat down. "Fine."

After the breakfast Tsuna was seen off to the airport by his family. Nana hugged him tightly. "Take care, Tsu-kun! And don't forget to give your mom a call when you arrive in Italy!"

Lambo tugged at his trouser leg. "And don't forget to bring Lambo-san sweets and souvenirs, Tsuna!"

"Lambo! Don't be greedy!"

Fuuta smiled at him. "I'll be waiting for your return, Tsuna-nii."

Finally Tsuna looked at Reborn who was resting in Bianchi's arms. "Aren't you going with me?"

"You're the only person who was invited, so it can't be helped. Have a safe journey."

Tsuna had a bad feeling about all this. He suspected that his father suddenly wanting to see him might have something to do with Vongola's affairs. Though it wasn't his only problem. It was his first time flying and he was scared to death. He spent the whole flight shaking with fear that the plane would crash. When it finally landed it Italy he sighed with relief.

The airport was extremely crowded, so Tsuna was relieved when he saw a familiar face. "We met again, Sawada-dono. It's good to see thou."

"Hi Basil. Good to see you too. But where is my father?"

"Give your papa a hug, Tsuna!"

Tsuna barely avoided his father's outstretched arms.

"Stop making a fool of yourself, father! I'm not a little kid!"

"You're breaking my heart, Tsuna! Why are you being so cold to your papa?"

Tsuna ignored his father's pleas and looked at him meaningfully. "Why did you want me to come here?"

Suddenly Iemitsu became serious. "It's not the best place to talk about it. Let's return to the mansion."

"The mansion?"

"It's not that far away from here Sawada-dono. Thou must be exhausted after your journey."

"Go with Basil, Tsuna. I have several things that need to be taken care of. We'll talk later."

"Don't forget to call the mother and tell her I arrived safely."

Iemitsu smiled widely. "Of course! You can always count on your papa, Tsuna!"

Tsuna sighed. "Just don't forget about it, okay?"

The mansion indeed was quite close. It took Tsuna and Basil only 15 minutes to get there by car. "So this is Vongola's headquarters? It's smaller than I thought."

"It's CDEF's headquarters, Sawada-dono. I'll show thou to thy room."

Tsuna followed Basil (who insisted on carrying his baggage) to a small but comfortable-looking room. "Dost thou need anything, Sawada-dono?"

Tsuna heard his stomach growling. On the plane he couldn't eat anything since his stomach was tightened with fear. "Actually I'm a little hungry."

"Shall we proceeded to the dining room, then?"

When Tsuna finished eating his late dinner (which consisted of delicious spaghetti) he asked Basil. "Do you know why my father wanted me to come to Italy?"

"Regrettably I have no such knowledge, Sawada-dono."

"I'm just hoping that he doesn't want to force me to become Vongola's tenth."

Some time later Tsuna was finally able to meet with Iemitsu. Actually it was his father who came to his room. "So father, will you tell me why I am here?"

"Your papa wanted to see your cute face!"

"Be serious, father."

"All right. It was Ninth's order."

"Eeee? Whaaat?"

"You see after the end of the Ring conflict we've been thinking about an appropriate punishment for Xanxus. Freezing him just another time it's not really an option and for obvious reasons he can't be executed either. So, we've decided that he should be made to serve you."

"Are you out of your mind, father? I don't want to die yet!"

"Ahhh, don't worry. Xanxus won't be able to do anything against you. We've confiscated his guns and put some restraints on him, so that he can't use his flame of rage. He's completely harmless now."

Tsuna wasn't too convinced. He was quite certain that Xanxus could've easily killed him using only his bare hands if he wanted to. But that wasn't the only problem here. "I can't agree to that, father. I did fought Xanxus but I did it only to protect my friends. I don't want to be mixed up in Vongola's affairs any longer."

"I'm sure that you're going to change your mind when you talk to the ninth tomorrow, Tsuna. For the meantime have a good night."

That night Tsuna had nightmares of being murdered by Xanxus in gruesome ways. When he woke up in the morning covered in cold sweat he decided that no matter what ninth's says he wouldn't agree to Xanxus being made his servant.


	2. Chapter 2

**_Author's note_**

I'm sorry for not updating for so long. I was very busy at school. Thank you all for your reviews, favs and alerts. There is no better motivation for me than to know that there are people who like my story :)

* * *

After Iemitsu met with his son on the airport and made sure that the boy would arrive safely to the CDEF mansion, he went to have a meeting with another person.

The room was small and rather dimly lit. Most of the space was occupied with something that looked like a hospital bed. The person lying on it looked at Iemitsu with distaste. "What the hell do you want?"

"You're looking well, Xanxus. The doctor said that your recovery is almost over. You'll be able to leave this place very soon."

"I bet you and that old fart can't wait to execute me. That's what he always wanted to do anyway."

Iemitsu sighed. Dealing with this boy was always difficult even in situations like this one when he was calm. "If Ninth wanted you dead, he wouldn't bother with getting you medical treatment, don't you think?"

Xanxus smiled. That smile contained all the malice in the world. "Who knows? Maybe his senility is making him do such pointless things."

Iemitsu wondered how Timoteo kept his patience with Xanxus. If he was his son, he would give him a good hiding. "We're not planning to kill you. But you should be aware that after what you did, it's inevitable that you receive punishment."

"What are you going to do? Put me in that ice again?"

"It's up to you and only you."

Xanxus narrowed his eyes with suspicion. "What?"

"Are you aware of family's rule, right? _The one who loses becomes the winner's subordinate_."

It didn't take Xanxus too long to grasp what Iemitsu meant. Scars emerged on his whole body. "LIKE HELL I'M GONNA SERVE THAT TRASH! I'D RATHER DIE!"

For a moment Iemitsu was afraid that the restraints that tied Xanxus to the bed would not be able to contain both his flames and anger. Fortunately Talbot was telling the truth when he said that they can absorb even the strongest flames. He smiled widely. "Dying it's not really an option. It either serving under Tsuna or being frozen forever. But don't you think it's a good opportunity to get used to it when Tsuna will eventually become Vongola's tenth? You'll end up being his subordinate anyway."

"SHUT UP! I'LL KILL YOU ALL! YOU TRASH!"

"You don't have make that decision right away. We'll talk again tomorrow. Take your time."

After Iemitsu left the room he saw a small figure in a black suit and fedora. "Ciaossu. He didn't take it too well, did he?"

"Yeah. Are you sure he'll agree?"

"Certainly. He hates being frozen above anything else. Just give him some time to calm down and think things over."

"If you say so, Reborn."

An enigmatic smile appeared on the little hitman's face. "It'll be a good lesson for both of them."

The next day Tsuna was taken by Iemitsu to Vongola's mansion. He was happy that he would be able to see someone who was like grandfather to him but on the same time he was afraid of the contents of their talk. The mansion turned out to be even bigger than Tsuna expected. Luckily for him, Iemitsu guided him straight to the ninth's room. The old man smiled warmly when he saw the boy. "Good morning, Tsunayoshi-kun. It's bee awhile. How have you been?"

"I'm fine. But more importantly, how are you? You're hurt pretty badly back then!"

"My wounds are mostly healed now. You shouldn't worry about it."

"But it was my fault!"

"No, the one who is to be blamed for it is me. It would have never happened, if I hadn't lied to Xanxus."

"But…"

Tsuna could understand that Xanxus might resent his father for telling him a lie. He himself was angry with Iemitsu when he learned that he had been in the mafia all this time. But he would've never try to kill him for it. And Xanxus did it twice. "…it wasn't really your fault, grandpa!"

Timoteo shook his head. "I want to believe that my son deep in his heart isn't a bad person. That's why I have this one request to you, Tsunayoshi-kun."

Tsuna gulped. He knew where it headed for. "My father already told me about this. But I can't agree! Xanxus will be even more angry if you force him to be my subordinate!"

Timoteo smiled at that. "It's true. But it'll be only temporary. My son needs to learn some humility. And there is no better person to teach him that than you, Tsunayoshi-kun. You were able to defeat him. By doing that you managed to win his respect."

"But he hates me!"

"It's also true. But I'm sure if you two tried to get along, you'd be a good influence on him. Please, Tsunayoshi-kun."

"Well, I can try but…"

"Thank you very much. I'm counting on you, Tsunayoshi-kun."

Tsuna left the room with a feeling that his remaining days in Italy would be a living hell. After the door closed behind him one of the vases staying on the ninth's desk moved. When it turned over it revealed a miniature hitman's face. "Ciaossu."

"So you were here all this time, Reborn?"

"Of course. I had to make sure that Tsuna will agree. But it went quite smoothly. He isn't ranked first in "the cannot refuse when asked" ranking for no reason."

"That kind heart is a great virtue of his. He'll make a great boss someday. That's why I choose him, after all."

With his head hung Tsuna went to his father. Iemitsu greeted him with a wide smile. "Did you agree, Tsuna?"

The boy nodded reluctantly. Iemitsu's smile grew even bigger. "That's great. So did Xanxus. Should we go see him?"

"Now? Isn't it a bit too fast, father?"

"Not at all. He's been waiting all this time. Come with me, Tsuna!"

Tsuna followed his father hesitantly. He didn't feel like meeting with Xanxus just yet. He was led to another room. Inside there was no one but the varia's boss. Xanxus was resting on a sofa with his legs placed on a coffee table. He was dressed in a simple, black suit but he wore it in similar way he did with his varia uniform – with a jacket on his shoulders and his tie loosely knotted. He gave both Tsuna and Iemitsu irritated looks when they entered the room. "You're late, trash."

"Sorry for keeping you waiting. Now that you two finally reunited how about you showing Tsuna around? He's never been in Italy before."

Tsuna whispered to Iemitsu. "D-don't leave me alone with him, father…"

Iemitsu whispered back to him. "Don't worry. His flames are sealed, so as long as you don't make him angry you should be all right."

"As long as I don't make him angry? Are you serious?"

Xanxus looked at them angrily and snarled. "I'm not a fucking tourist guide."

Iemitsu gave him a disapproving look in response. "That was the order from the ninth."

Xanxus ground his teeth but he stood up and headed for the door. Tsuna was hesitant to follow him. "Are you going or not, trash?"

"I-I'm going…"

Tsuna wondered how they managed to convince Xanxus to agree. He also thought that even though it was Xanxus who was supposed to be his subordinate, he was the one being ordered around. He could barely keep up with him. The varia boss was moving quite fast. But suddenly he stopped. "I bet you feel good about yourself."

"N-no! I agreed only because your father asked me for it!"

"That old fart isn't my father."

"But even though you aren't blood-related he still loves you as his real chi…"

Xanxus turned over promptly. There were no scars on his face yet but Tsuna could tell that he was quite angry.

"Give me that "unconditional love" crap again, and I'll kill you, trash!"

Tsuna decided it was safer not to talk. The rest of their way they spent in silence. He asked only once. "Umm, where are we going actually?"

"You'll see soon, trash."


	3. Chapter 3

**_Author's note_**

Thank you for all your responses! Luckily I managed to update this chapter faster.

* * *

The place in which they eventually ended up turned out to be a nearby bar. When Xanxus and Tsuna entered it, several terrified glances fell on the former. Xanxus, however, ignored them and headed straight to the bartender who smiled pleasantly to him. "It's been ages since I've last seen you, Xanxus. Where have you been?"

"It's none of your business, trash."

"Polite as always. What would you like?"

"Give me a bottle of Barbaresco."

The bartender looked at Xanxus surprised. "It's pretty unusual stuff for you. Are you sure?"

"It's not for me." Now Bartender noticed a small, Asian boy who sat next to Xanxus. "Excuse me, but your companion looks like a minor to me…"

"Since _when_ it's a problem?"

"Fine, fine. Here you are."

The bartender brought a bottle of vine and a glass. Then he placed both of them in front of Tsuna. The boy, who didn't understand a word in Italian, looked at Xanxus questioningly. "Drink it, trash. It's my treat."

"Are you joking? I'm under-age! I can't drink alcohol!"

Xanxus smiled maliciously in response. "If you refuse to drink it, then it means that I'm allowed to kill you. How about it trash?"

"You're not making any sense!"

"He's right!" A small figure in a pink suit and a top hat crawled from under the counter. Tsuna couldn't believe his own eyes. "Reborn! What are you doing here?"

"Ciaossu. My name is Giuseppe Rosso, an expert on vine and mafia law."

Xanxus narrowed his red eyes. "Like hell. You're that shitty arcobaleno." It didn't look like Reborn's disguise could fool him.

"What did you mean when you said that Xanxus is right, Reborn?"

Reborn smiled and turned to Tsuna. "According to mafia law, refusing a drink when someone is treating you is considered a grave insult. So it's permissible to kill the one who refuses."

"Hiiii! All right, I'll drink it!"

Tsuna thought that perhaps one glass wouldn't kill him. Would it? He poured himself some wine and drank it quickly. The bartender smiled and said something in Italian to him. Tsuna looked questioningly at Rebrn and Xanxus. "He asked whether you liked it, trash."

Tsuna who was beginning to feel a bit light-headed nodded hesitantly. The wine didn't taste that bad. It was quite good actually. The bartender smiled again and poured Tsuna another glass.

"Am I supposed to drink it?"

"The mafia law, remember?"

Tsuna sighed and downed the glass. Soon everything around him started to spin wildly. He felt himself falling. Xanxus looked at the laying boy contemptuously. "Down in two glasses. How pathetic."

"Well, it's understandable. He doesn't have _your_ experience."

Xanxus ignored Reborn and turned to the bartender. "Bring me some whisky."

Reborn jumped down from the counter and took Tsuna's place. "Since Tsuna can't do it anymore I'm going to finish this Barbaresco for him."

The bartender looked at the arcobaleno somewhat concerned. "Excuse me, mister, but no matter how I look at you, you're still a baby…"

In response Reborn pointed a gun at him. "Got any problem with that?"

The bartender gulped. "Of course not! Enjoy your wine, mister!"

The next morning Tsuna woke up in an unfamiliar bed and with a terrible headache. He slowly opened his eyes and saw a blushing, triangular face with big, brown eyes and happy smile. "Haru?"

"Hahi! You're awake, Tsuna-san! Good morning!"

Tsuna blinked several times just to make sure he wasn't still dreaming. Then other people appeared.

"Juudaimee!"

"Good morning, Tsuna. Did you sleep well?"

"Gokudera-kun? Yamamoto? And even Bianchi? What are you doing in Italy?"

"What kind of question is that? I was brought here by my love for Reborn."

Bianchi was holding onto Reborn and blushing. The one who answered Tsuna was Gokudera. "Reborn-san told us that you went to Italy for a special training. He even gave us tickets, so that we can follow you."

"It looked like fun. Haha."

"Haru went too!"

Tsuna was actually happy that his friends were around. Though he wasn't too sure how they would react to Xanxus. No to mention how Xanxus would react to them. He might've been a bit more sociable than Hibari but still...Rebron seemed to understand his concerns as he spoke. "Now Tsuna has to undergo a special training. You'll see him again this evening. How about doing some sightseeing until then? Bianchi and Gokudera you're natives of Italy, so why don't you show Haru and Yamamoto around?"

"I'd rather stay with you, Reborn!"

"Why should I show that baseball freak and stupid woman around?"

"Hahi! Who do you call stupid woman!"

"Ma, ma. It's all right."

It took some time but eventually both Tsuna and Reborn were able to convince Gokudera and Bianchi to go. Then they went along the long corridor of Vongola's mansion. "Why did you bring them here, Reborn?"

"Aren't you happy that they are here with you? Even though Kyoko and Ryohei couldn't come because of a family trip."

"I'm happy but the situation is now quite awkward...And wouldn't they be in danger?"

"Don't worry. Xanxus won't do to anything to them. His flames were sealed with powerful restraints. He won't be able to break them unless he gets very angry. By the way, we have to wake him up."

Tsuna was worried that it wouldn't be much of a problem for Xanxus to get very angry when he's around. Finally they reached and entered the room with two Xs on the door. Inside they saw a young woman in a maid's uniform. She turned all red when she noticed them. "Excuse me!"

She left the room hastily. Tsuna wondered what was wrong with her as he approached Xanxus' bed. He was amazed to see that varia boss looked like a completely different person with his features calm and relaxed in his sleep. "He sleeps so peacefully…Maybe we shouldn't wake him up?"

Reborn jumped from Tsuna's shoulder onto the bed. "Of course we have to wake him up. Did you forget about your training? But this guy is a very heavy sleeper. Should I use vonogola's traditional method to wake him up?"

Reborn had the appropriate medical equipment ready but Tsuna grabbed the little hitman to stop him. "Don't do it, Reborn! Even if he wakes up after that, he'll kill us both for sure!"

"Then it can't be helped. I'll use something else."

Reborn transformed Leon into a dictaphone and pressed a small button. A very loud noise was heard. "VOOOOOOOOOOIIIIII!"

Xansus opened his eyes instantly and threw a pillow in Reborn's direction. "Shut up and let me sleep, you shitty shark!"

Tsuna stared at the scene with his eyes wide from shock. "Amazing! He reacted to it immediately!"

Xanxus yawned and then looked grudgingly at Tsuna and Reborn. "It's you trash. What do you want?"


	4. Chapter 4

**_Author's note_**

I really planned to update earlier but it's been a really hectic week for me. I had even less free time during those holidays than when I had to go the school. But I hope that you all had merry Christmas like me :)

* * *

Reborn ignored Xanxus' visible discontent and cheerfully announced. "Today you're supposed to train with Tsuna."

"I'm not moving an inch until I eat breakfast."

"Of course. Me and Tsuna also haven't eaten yet."

Tsuna looked around the room. It was spacious and well-furnished. He also noticed some hunting trophies on the wall. The maid must've brought the breakfast since the table was loaded with food. Xanxus stood up, stretched lazily and sat at it. Reborn joined him and helped himself to the food. Tsuna followed him hesitantly. He spotted some strange shackles with engraved symbols on Xanxus' wrists. He guessed that they were the restraints that his father and Reborn were talking about. The silence was broken by Reborn who spoke to Xanxus. "This used to be your old room. The ninth didn't change a thing in here. Doesn't it bring back the memories?"

Xanxus narrowed his eyes and gave the arcobaleno a hostile glare. "The hell are you telling me about this?"

"Your father really cares about you."

"Bullshit!"

Tsuna was almost hit by a porcelain plate that Xanxus threw at him. It hit the wall and broke to pieces. The boy cringed. "What did I tell you about giving me that crap, trash?"

"Sorry, I didn't mean to anger you…"

"If Xanxus was really angry, you'd be already dead, Tsuna. You merely annoyed him."

Reborn said that with a carefree smile on his little face. Xanxus ignored them both and continued consuming his breakfast. Tsuna was almost fascinated to see someone eating so much. He wondered how the varia boss managed to stay slim. It was probably his flame of rage that burnt off calories.

Finally the breakfast was over and they headed for the vongola's training hall. Tsuna was nervous about fighting Xanxus once again. Last time he could barely win. Reborn noticed his nervousness and spoke. "As you two probably guessed you're going to fight. But there are some restrictions."

Reborn took out a small device and pushed some buttons. Then he threw a gun towards Xanxus.

"I deactivated one of your restraints. You may use your left hand freely now."

Xanxus smiled as he took the gun.

"One hand is more than enough."

Tsuna had a very bad feeling when Reborn spoke to him.

"Since Xanxus can't use his full power, you're not allowed to use "zero point breakthrough first edition" either."

Tsuna expected that. Though he didn't plan to use that technique anyway. He took a dying will pill and braced himself. "I'm ready."

Xanxus reloaded his gun. "So am I."

"You two seem to be willing to fight. That's fine. Let's start."

Without any warning Xanxus fired his gun at Tsuna but the boy evaded it swiftly. He already knew his opponent's fighting style and was able to predict his moves. He evaded other blows by flying using his x-gloves. However, he wasn't expecting Xanxus to show right behind his back. He received a hard kick and fell to the ground. The varia boss landed next to him with a satisfied smirk. "Didn't I tell you one hand is more than enough to eradicate you, trash?"

Tsuna stood up and looked at Xanxus challengingly. "If one hand is more than enough than why didn't you fire your gun at me?"

Xanxus frowned. "What?"

"With just one hand you can't shoot when you're in the air, am I right?"

Seeing how Xanxus ground his teeth Tsuna was sure that he guessed correctly. It gave him an advantage albeit small. He took flight again. "Don't think you've already won, trash!"

Xanxus fired several shots at him. Tsuna absorbed them all using zero point breakthrough custom. Though he could tell that they were gradually gaining in strength as Xanxus become angrier. He was aware that the longer the fight was going to last, the worse it would become for him. He dodged the next shot.

"Why aren't you attacking? Are you looking down on me, trash?"

Tsuna decided that the only chance for him to win was to somehow deprive Xanxus of his gun. He waited for him to run out of bullets and then attacked before that Varia boss could reload. The gun was knocked out of Xanxus' hand and he himself was pressed to the ground with Tsuna landing on top of him. Xanxus' rage reached its peak and scars started to emerge on his face. "You fucking scum! I'll burn you to ashes!"

Tsuna saw the flame of rage forming in Xanxus' hand and understood that he made a grave mistake. Just as he was bracing himself for a certain death he heard Reborn's carefree voice. "The fight is over. The winner is Xanxus!"

Reborn pressed the buttons on the device and the flame disappeared from Xanxus' hand. Tsuna sighed with relief and went out of dying will mode. "Thanks god! I'm saved!"

"Get off me, trash!"

Only now Tsuna realized that he was still sitting on Xanxus. He was thrown off violently.

"Ouuuch! It hurt!"

Reborn landed on Tsuna's back and started jumping repeatedly. "It hurts even more, Reborn!"

"You lost the fight. You still have a lot to learn, no-good Tsuna."

"I know it! Please stop!"

Xanxus stood up and put on his jacket that fell off during his fight with Tsuna. The scars were mostly gone from his face, so he apparently had calmed down. "If the fight is over, then it's nothing for me to do here. I'm leaving."

Reborn paused his jumping on Tsuna's back to look at Xanxus who was already walking away. "Yeah. Thank you for your cooperation."

Then he turned to Tsuna. "I'm pissed off at you. If I didn't stop the fight, Xanxus would've killed you."

"Yes, I know. But I didn't really want to hurt him…"

"Too bad for you since he was being serious."

"I wonder why there is so much anger in him? I know the life wasn't easy on him but he has a loving father and loyal subordinates and all…"

Reborn smiled at that. "He is just being spoiled and immature. Hopefully he'll grew up out of it. He's only two years older than you anyway."

Tsuna was quite astonished. "Two years older than me? Do you mean he's 16? The same age as Hibari? How is that possible?"

"Officially he's 24 but he spent 8 years being frozen in the ice. I know you suck at math but you should be able to do such a simple subtraction."

Tsuna would've never guessed that Xanxus was that young. He certainly didn't look his age. But the more he thought about it, the more sense it made. Reborn continued. "The cradle incident was probably the result of the rebellious age gone wrong."

"I really hope he'll reconcile with the ninth…"

"I think it's possible. In 10 years time, that is."

Just as Tsuna and Reborn left the training hall they run into the same maid they met in the Xanxus' room. She was a young, pretty girl with tanned skin, dark wavy hair and olive-brown eyes. She bowed to both of them. "I wanted to apologize for my earlier, unacceptable behavior, Reborn-sama, Sawada-sama."

Tsuna was a little perplexed. He didn't speak Italian at all, yet this maid's Japanese was almost perfect. "But you don't have to apologize. You didn't do anything wrong, right?"

The maid blushed slightly as she spoke. "Then could you please not tell Xanxus-sama about it?"

"Of course. We won't tell Xanxus that you're stalking him."

The maid's face turned all red when she heard Reborn's answer. "I'm not stalking him! I…I'm just observing him from afar! And he's very photogenic! Want to see?"

Before Tsuna could say anything the maid showed him a photo album. It was filled with pictures of Xanxus. He didn't have scars in most of them, so Tsuna guessed they must've been at least 8 years old. The most recent one depicted him with scars and sleeping. It was probably taken this morning. Next the maid showed Tsuna a small, black-and-white photograph in a decorative frame. It showed a little, black-haired boy with a murderous glare. "This one I took when the ninth brought him here. He was so cute then."

"I wouldn't call that cute…"

The maid ignored Tsuna's remark and showed them another picture this time in a golden frame. It depicted Xanxus sitting at the table with a rather bored look on his face. "This was when he spoke to me for the first time."

"Really? What did he say?"

"He said: The next time you bring me coffee that isn't black will be your last, trash."

"Sounds like fond memories."

"Don't make fun of her, Reborn!"


	5. Chapter 5

**_Author's note_**

It's another late update. Lately I've been having motivation problems :(

* * *

The maid smiled when she heard Tsuna reprimanding Reborn. "It's all right. He wasn't being nice but the sole fact that Xanxus-sama noticed me made me so happy…"

"Then why don't you tell him that you like him?"

"He is a son of the ninth vongola boss and he rejected many daughters of powerful mafiosi. What chances has a maid such as me?"

Reborn smirked. "You'd never know unless you try."

"Reborn! Just what are making that girl do!"

"It's all right, Sawada-sama. I'd rather observe him from afar. But could please tell me why Xanxus-sama disappeared for 8 years? Does it have something to do with his scars?"

"Sorry we can't tell you."

"I understand. It's omertà, right?"

Tsuna looked at the maid surprised. "Omertà? What is that?"

The girl's eyes enlarged to the size of saucers. "You don't know what omertà is?"

"This one is no-good. He doesn't have a clue about mafia laws. Could you explain it to him?"

The girl was still astonished at Tsuna's ignorance but she promptly complied with Reborn's request. "Omertà is a code of silence, Sawada-sama. To put it simply, it means avoiding interfering in the business of others and _especially_ not informing the authorities even when a crime is committed. Those who break omertà are punished with death."

Tsuna trembled. "Scary…"

The maid smiled reassuringly to him. " Such is mafia world. I have to go now but don't hesitate to call for me when you need something. My name is Ida."

Tsuna watched the maid as she walked away. "She's such a nice girl. I wonder what she sees in Xanxus."

"According to my sources Xanxus is rather popular with girls."

"Really?"

"Yeah. Just as Ida said, before the cradle incident there was a number of women who sought to marry him. He turned all of them down mercilessly."

"It sounds like something he'd do."

Suddenly Tsuna's and Reborn conversation was interrupted by a very loud voice. "VOOOOOIII!"

"Hiiie! It's him!"

Before Tsuna could do anything Squalo approached him, grabbed at his blouse and started shaking him vigorously. "VOOOII SAWADA! WHERE IS XANXUS! WHAT DID YOU DO TO HIM?"

Luckily for Tsuna, Squalo released him when a big, porcelain vase smashed into his head. "WHAT THE…?"

"You're too loud, shitty-shark."

"BOSS!"

Only then Tsuna noticed that they were standing next to Xanxus' room. The owner of the said room didn't appear to be pleased in the slightest as Squalo came closer to him. "The hell are you doing here?"

"VOIII! THE VARIA'S RESTLESS! THEY KEEP ASKING ME ABOUT YOUR RETURN! ESPECIALLY THAT IDIOT LEVI! HE PESTERS ME ALL THE TIME!"

Xanxus narrowed his eyes and folded his arms. "I'll return when that old fart gets bored of making hell out of my life."

Tsuna observed them with a twitching brow. He wondered how Xanxus could claim his life was being hell while he wasn't the one who had to hang around with a violent psycho with a serious anger-managing problem. Squalo seemed to mellow when he heard his boss' answer. "XANXUS, IF YOU WANT ME TO STAY HERE JUST SAY A WOR…"

"Like hell I want."

Xanxus unceremoniously punched his second-in-command in the head. "WHAT WAS THAT FOR?"

"Go back to Varia HQ and wait for my return. It's an order."

Squalo nodded obediently and started walking away while massaging his aching head. Tsuna almost felt bad for him. Xanxus yawned and was intending to return to his room when Reborn spoke to him. "Tsuna wants to ask you a question."

Xanxus stopped in his tracks and glared at Tsuna. "What is it now?"

Reborn spoke again before Tsuna could even protest. "He wonders if there is a girl you like."

"There is none. Do you have any more stupid questions to ask, trash? I'd like to continue my nap."

Tsuna shook his head and Xanxus returned to his room shutting the door behind himslef rather loudly. "What was that for, Reborn?"

"If there is no girl he likes that means Ida still has a chance."

"Ida? Do you want to that poor girl to get hurt?"

"It would do Xanxus good, if he had a girlfriend. Also he doesn't really care about people's backgrounds, so he wouldn't mind she's a maid."

"That only means he would treat her just as _bad_ as he treated that mafia girls!"

In his room Xanxus tumbled into the bed and closed his eyes. He was in a very foul mood. Squalo's arrival unnerved him to an extent but the real reason of his irritation was Sawada Tsunayoshi. That boy annoyed him so much that he could barely stop himself from killing him in a very painful way. The only thing that was preventing him from doing so, was awareness of what would happen next. He would be put in that ice again. He preferred death to spending the eternity in that cold prison, unable to do anything.

That's why he put up with Sawada. He knew what was his so called "father's" true goal. That old man intended to break his will. But Xanxus was not the one to give himself up easily. He would let them think they won. And when they eventually let their guard down, he would have his vengeance. They moment he would be from the restraints that he loathed with all his heart, he would kill all those trash without mercy. Xanxus was filled with hate for all people around him, his father, Iemitsu, his trash of a son, even his pushy second in command…

A sudden flashing snapped him out of his thoughts. His eyes flew open. He saw a maid with a camera. He recognized her as she kept following him and taking his picture since he was small. "I'm sorry, Xanxus-sama…I didn't mean to wake you…"

Without a word he stood up and took the camera from her. Then he smashed it into pieces. "Do it again, trash and the same thing will happen to your head."

The maid ran away crying. Xanxus returned to the bed. His mood even darkened. "Everyone is trash. They should just die."


	6. Chapter 6

**_Author's note_**

Long times between the updates seem to become a habit of mine. Well, it can't be helped, life tends to be time-consuming. Anyway, to some of you Xanxus may sound a bit misogynistic in this chapter but don't get him wrong. It's not that he hates women. He hates _everyone_. I try to keep him ic but sadly a sweetheart he is not.

* * *

Tsuna was happy. Since Reborn told him that there was no need for him to deal with Xanxus for the rest of the day, he thought that he would be able to spend it in peace. He was proven wrong when he bumped into a sobbing maid in the corridor. "Ida-san? What happened?"

"I… it's nothing, Sawada-sama!"

Tsuna had an awful suspicion. What if the poor girl actually followed Reborn's advice and confessed her feelings? "It was Xanxus, wasn't he?"

"No! It's all my fault! I was the one to anger him!"

"But he did something to you, didn't he?"

Ida shook her head and ran away while hiding her face in her palms. Tsuna was aggravated. "That Xanxus! How could he do that to her!"

Reborn smiled cunningly as he looked at his student. "You want to help her, right?"

"Yes, but is there anything I can do?"

"Help her with your dying will!"

In an instant Rebron changed Leon into a green gun and shoot Tsuna in the head. The boy fell to the ground but he stood up almost immediately and ripped his clothes, leaving only his boxers intact. A flame appeared on his forehead and his eyes turned orange.

"REBORN! I'LL MAKE XANXUS APOLOGIZE TO HER WITH MY DYING WILL!"

"That's the way to go, Tsuna."

Most people would be utterly shocked if someone stormed to their room wearing only the underwear and shouted. "XANXUS! APOLOGIZE TO IDA RIGHT AWAY!"

But Xanxus merely raised an eyebrow, irritated that someone interrupted his nap just again. "Did someone hit you in the head really hard, trash? And who the hell is Ida?"

"IDA IS THE GIRL THAT YOU MISTREATED!"

"I mistreated a lot of women. Can't you be more specific?"

"SHE'S THE MAID WITH DARK HAIR!"

"Half of the maids here has dark hair. But in case you're talking about that bitch with the camera, then know that she had it coming."

"APOLOGIZE TO HER! NOW!"

Xanxus narrowed his eyes angrily. "Apologize for what? For stalking me since I was 9?"

Tsuna hated to admit but Xanxus had a point. The flame on his forehead disappeared and his eyes returned to their natural, brown color. His resolve weakened considerably but he still tried to persuade Xanxus. "But she really likes you…"

In response Xanxus burst out laughing. "She likes me? Phahahaha! I'll tell you one thing, trash. The things that women really like are money and power. They'll like anyone as long as they can profit by it."

"Not all women are like that!"

"Say what you want, trash. I'm not changing my mind. And I won't apologize to that bitch."

"But…"

Xanxus stared at Tsuna challengingly. "Make me do it."

Tsuna felt really frustrated. He never came across someone who was that bitter, hateful and full of anger. "Why do you hate everyone so much?"

"And why are such a pathetic wimp that can't even fight properly without the assistance of your shitty tutor?"

Tsuna was taken aback with that question. "I…it's just the way I am, I guess?"

"You have your answer. If you have nothing more to say to me then leave now, trash."

Tsuna felt utterly defeated. He hung his head low and headed for the door.

"One more thing, trash. Put some clothes on, you're an eyesore."

Tsuna closed the door behind him. He was dispirited. "Is it possible that Xanxus is truly evil? That there is no hope for him?"

But after some consideration, the boy shook his head. "No, it's impossible. The ninth believes in him. If there is some good even in the likes of Hibari and Mukuro, there must be some in Xanxus too. I'll just have to reach to him."

Tsuna made a resolution. Until now he concentrated mostly on surviving and avoiding angering Xanxus. But starting today he would try to devote what remained of his holidays to befriend the varia boss and get on his good side. But first he had to go to his new room and get dressed.

Next he went to search for Reborn. But instead of his miniature tutor, he found Yamamoto. His rain guardian was talking to Squalo and patting him on the shoulder in a friendly manner.

"STOP PATTING ME!"

Tsuna watched this scene in surprise. "What are you two doing here?"

Yamamoto smiled happily and answered Tsuna's question. "We had to go back earlier because Gokudera suddenly felt ill. I was going to tell you about it but I bumped into Squalo. He's telling me to practice my sword skills and become a hitman. Isn't he funny? Hahaha."

"VOIII! I WASN'T JOKING! YOU'VE GOT TALENT BUT YOU'RE WASTING IT ON THAT SHITTY BASEBALL OF YOURS!"

"Ummm weren't you supposed to go back to varia headquarters?"

"I WAS GOING TO BUT THAT BRAT BUMPED INTO ME! I'LL GO NOW! THOSE IDIOTS CAN'T BE LEFT ALONE FOR TOO LONG!"

Squalo moved towards the exit but Tsuna stopped him. "Wait! Don't go yet, I wanted to ask you something!"

The varia second-in-command glared at Tsuna suspiciously. "WHAT DO YOU WANT, SAWADA?"

"You know Xanxus for a long time, right?"

"YEAH, AND?"

"And you probably know what he likes?"

"WHY EXACTLY ARE YOU ASKING ME THIS?"

" Well, I try to get along with him but no matter what I do it seems to annoy him…"

"VOIII! ARE YOU STUPID, SAWADA? YOU'VE BEATEN XANXUS, STOLE THE POSITION OF VONGOLA BOSS FROM HIM AND YOU'RE SURPRISED THAT HE'S ANNOYED WITH YOU? IT'S A WONDER WHY HE HASN'T KILLED YOU YET!"

"That's why I asked you about his likes! Is there a way to improve his mood?"

Squalo answered him without the hesitation. "IF YOU WANT TO IMPROVE HIS MOOD, THEN LET HIM BEAT YOU!"

Tsuna looked at Squalo in disbelief. "Are you serious?"

"WHY WOULDN'T I BE?"

Squalo wasn't being sarcastic or ironic in the slightest. To him it was entirely natural because Xanxus took it out on him all the time. But the prospect of receiving the beating scared Tsuna to death. "Is there no other way?"

This time Squalo needed to think a little longer. "GOOD FOOD AND ALCOHOL CAN DO THE TRICK TOO!"

"Alcohol is out of question but I try with food. Thanks a lot!"


	7. Chapter 7

**Author's note**

I'm sorry, dear readers. It took me even longer to update than usual. My sister who usually helps me with writing this story, (but she still refuses to be my full-time beta) didn't have much time for me this week. I try to do better, I promise!

* * *

When Squalo left, Tsuna spoke to Yamamoto. "You said that Gokudera-kun suddenly felt ill. What exactly happened?"

"We were touring Rome when his face suddenly turned blue and he collapsed."

"Let me guess, Bianchi removed her goggles?"

Yamamoto looked at Tsuna in astonishment. "How did you know?"

Tsuna simply facepalmed. "Where is she now?"

"She's tending to him."

"Poor Gokudera-kun. He won't get better anytime soon."

"Hahaha. I'm sure she'll take a good care of him. She's such a loving sister."

Tsuna sighed wondering how someone could be so oblivious. Though he had another question to ask. "And what about Har…"

"Pom pom pom! How do you like Haru's new costume, Tsuna-san?"

"Errrr…What is that?"

"Hahi! It's Colosseum's cosplay! Can't you see?"

To Tsuna it looked like Haru was wearing a hoop made of cardboard but he didn't voice that thought. "Yeah, sure, if you say so."

"Bianchi promised to take us to Pisa tomorrow! Haru wants to cosplay the Leaning Tower too! Will you go with us, Tsuna-san?"

"I can't. I have to stay here and deal with a certain someone."

Yamamoto smiled. "Do you mean Xanxus? How is he?"

"He's constantly in a bad mood."

"Hahi! Who is that Xanxus you're talking about? A friend of yours?"

Before Tsuna could answer Haru's question, one of the paintings moved revealing a hole in the wall. Inside Reborn was sitting at a miniature table and sipping an espresso.

"He's Tsuna's cousin. Sort of."

"Reborn! Don't appear out of the blue! And stop misinforming Haru!"

"I wasn't misinforming her. You two may be not blood-related but you're still family, right?"

Haru blinked and looked at Tsuna questioningly. "Haru doesn't understand. Is he your cousin or not?"

"Well, it's complicated."

"If you can't leave him alone, than maybe you can take him with us to Pisa tomorrow?"

"It's a bad idea. He's not very sociable."

"To put it mildly. Hahaha."

Even Yamamoto realized how bad Xanxus' personality was. But Haru was quite disappointed. She made a decision. "If Tsuna-san can't go, then Haru will stay here with him!"

Only then Tsuna realized that Haru's presence may be actually helpful to his case. "If you're staying, then maybe you can help me with something, Haru?"

A big smile appeared on Harus' face and her eyes shone like stars. "Haru will help her future husband with pleasure!"

"Just drop the "future husband" part, okay? I was told that Xanxus likes food, so I thought of giving him some to improve his mood. But I can't cook."

"Haru'll cook something for him! But what does he like?"

"I forgot to ask…"

"It's not a problem, Tsuna-san! Haru will bake a delicious cake! Everyone like cakes!"

Reborn smirked under his nose. He knew he would have much fun tomorrow...

The next day Tsuna went to Xanxus' room. It was noon, so he hoped that the varia boss would be already awake. But to his dismay Haru insisted on going with him. "You really shouldn't go with me Haru. Xanxus is a really dangerous person. And he has a bad temper too."

"It doesn't matter. Haru will be nice to him. After all, he's Tsuna-san's family, right?"

"Haru, I'm serious, he's…"

Tsuna didn't manage to finish his sentence when Haru knocked at the Xanxus' door and entered the room without even waiting for an answer. "Good morning! My name is Miura Haru! Pleased to meet you!"

Xanxus looked at Haru with a hint of annoyance on his face. He was in the process of buttoning up his shirt. Haru reacted to it immediately. "Hahi! Why is your shirt unbuttoned? Are you a pervert?"

Xanxus narrowed his eyes dangerously. "You sure have the cheek to call me a pervert when you're the one coming to me while I'm changing, you dumb woman. The hell do you want? I had the breakfast already."

Tsuna's eyebrow twitched. He realized that Xanxus mistook Haru for a maid.

"Hahi! What a rude person! He's even worse than Gokudera-san!"

Tsuna whispered to Haru's ear. "I told you. He's not very friendly."

Haru decided to be strong and treat her future husband's cousin nicely. She managed to smile and placed the plate with the cake in front of Xanxus. "Here, we brought you a cake."

"I won't eat it."

"Hahi! Why? Haru spent so much time doing it! It's Namimori Special Cheesecake! And it's delicious!"

"I hate sweet stuff."

Haru's face slowly turned blue. She couldn't comprehend how was it even possible that someone didn't like sweet things. Tsuna sensed that it might end in disaster, so he decided it was better to leave now before Xanxus became pissed off. Just as he was heading for the door dragging the stunned Haru along with him, someone else appeared. "It's good to know that someone is knowledgeable about good cooking. Here, eat this."

"A poison cooking? Why is Bianchi here?"

Bianchi placed the dish, that looked like a ball of violet worms, in front of Xanxus. The latter ignored her altogether and spoke directly to Tsuna. "Are you trying to poison me, trash?"

"No, of course not! What are you doing, Bianchi?"

"Reborn told me that this one is a very picky eater. So I thought that he'll definitely appreciate my cuisine."

Without the word Xanxus took the dish and threw at the wall. The violet mass dissolved a good portion of it. Bianchi was understandably pissed off. "What are you doing with my cooking, you bastard?"

"You call this shit cooking?"

Xanxus smiled mockingly. Tsuna was afraid that a fight would break out. But no such thing happened. Bianchi simply shrugged her arms. "You lack love. That's why you can't appreciate my food. I feel sorry for you."

Xanxus frowned. "What did you say, you poisonous bitch?"

But Bianchi had already left. Xanxus was visibly unnerved but he calmed down rather quickly and spoke. "I changed my mind. I'll have that cake."

"Really?"

Haru smiled cheerfully and handed Xanxus the plate. Again Tsuna had a bad feeling. And this time he was proven right since the cheesecake landed straight on his face. "Bwhahaha! That look suits you well, trash!"

"Hahi! That person is dangerous!"

Tsuna left the room with shocked Haru clinging on him.

"Your cousin is really scary, Tsuna-san!"

"I warned you, didn't I?"

Tsuna sighed. Nevertheless, he _did_ manage to improve Xanxus' mood. But at what price!


	8. Chapter 8

**_Author's note_**

I'm sorry, I'm very sorry that I didn't keep my promise, dear readers! *Hits the floor with her forehead Gokudera style* My sister started dating some guy and she doesn't have time for me anymore! I barely managed to beg her for help with this chapter! :(

* * *

"Oh my! Sawada-sama, what happened?"

Ida, who was just passing trough, saw the pitiful state Tsuna's face was in. She took out the handkerchief and gently wiped it. Haru wasn't too happy about this. "Hahi! Why are you touching my Tsuna-san?"

"I just wanted to help. It was Xanxus-sama's doing, wasn't it?"

"I'm sorry, Ida-san. I couldn't convince him to apologize to you."

When Ida heard Tsuna's sincere apology, she giggled good-naturedly. "Tee hee. You wanted to make him apologize to me? It's impossible. Xanxus-sama is too arrogant and too full of pride to do something like that."

She blushed slightly while uttering the last sentence which didn't go unnoticed by Haru. "Hahi! You say it as if it was a good thing!"

"It isn't? The pride is an indispensable trait of a mafia boss."

"He's a mafia boss?"

Tsuna decided to quickly change the topic before Haru learned too much. "You said that you knew Xanxus since he was a child, right Ida-san?"

"It's true. We're more or less the same age."

"Hahi, you're childhood friends?"

"Ah, no. Far from that. We hardly even spoke with each other. As a child Xanxus-sama was a bit of an introvert. He opened up a little more later thanks to Timoteo-sama."

Ida showed Haru a picture of Xanxus as a child. The latter was thrilled. "He's so cute desu! But how is it even possible that such a cute, little boy grew up to be such a big, perverted jerk?"

"He might be a jerk but he's not actually perverted, Haru. It was _you_ who invaded his privacy."

Tsuna was in fact amazed that Haru's behavior didn't piss Xanxus off. It seemed that his way of thinking was more complex than Tsuna initially suspected. Though it was a good thing to know that not everything could irritate Xanxus. Still, the plan to get on varia boss' good side resulted in failure. But not everything was lost. Tsuna spoke to Ida. "Since you stal…I mean know Xanxus for so long, maybe you can tell me about his likes and dislikes? I'm having really hard time trying not to anger him."

"Well, Xanxus-sama likes to eat. A lot. Especially steaks. But he's very picky and it's difficult to please him. The filet mignon is probably to safest dish to serve him but there is still a good chance that'll be thrown right at your face."

"I've already tried with food and it was disaster. What about something else?"

"He also likes to drink alcohol. And contrary to food, he isn't very picky about it. If it's at least 40%, he'll drink it. Tequila and whisky are his favorites."

"Alcohol is too out of qu…Ouchhh!"

Tsuna didn't manage to quit since Reborn landed on his face. "Alcohol is the best option, no-good Tsuna!"

Ida nodded. "It's true. Xanxus-sama is at his nicest after drinking some alcohol."

"But I can't drink it! I'm a minor!"

"Who said that you have to drink it?"

Xanxus was bored. He didn't like it one bit. If it wasn't for Iemitsu confiscating his guns, he'd gladly go practice some shooting. The only consolation was that he most probably wouldn't by bothered by that Sawada trash. At least not for today, after he received his well-deserved lesson. Xanxus couldn't comprehend why the old man wanted to make that worthless trash, the next boss. Did he wished for Vongola to cease to exist? Anyone would be better, even Iemitsu. Maybe the ninth really was becoming senile with the old age?

At any rate, Xanxus decided to call for a maid and order her to bring him some tequila. Alcohol was the only thing that made his shitty situation somewhat bearable. He opened the door just to find no one else but Sawada Tsunayoshi standing before him. "…Hello?"

"What happened, trash? You didn't bring your two girlfriends with you this time?"

"My two girlfriends? Who do you mean?"

"The dumb one and the poisonous one. You've got terrible taste in women, by the way."

"Haru and Bianchi aren't my girlfriends!"

"I don't give a shit, anyway. Why did you come here?"

Tsuna took out a bottle of tequila. "Here, I brought you this."

For a moment Xanxus wondered if the boy didn't have mind-reading powers. But he didn't lower his guard. "Did you poison it, trash?"

"Of course not! Why would I do such a thing?"

"If I were you, I would poison it. Getting rid of me, would spare you a lot of troubles, Am I right?"

"I'm not like that! What you did was wrong but I don't have a grudge against you! I just wish that you stopped hating me so much!"

Xanxus narrowed his eyes but he took the bottle. Tsuna smiled hopefully. "So, you're accepting it?"

"I'm obliged to accept it by mafia law. But you're going to drink it with me, trash."

"I can't do that! This stuff is too strong for me! Even wine is too…"

"Will you shut up, already? One sip is enough. Just tell the maid to bring two glasses, some salt and a lemon."

Tsuna followed the order. Soon Ida brought him the items he asked for. Xanxus poured tequila to the glasses. Tsuna asked him. "To what lemon and salt will be needed?"

"First lick some salt. Then have a drink. Finally bite the lemon. There is a chance that you won't drop dead instantly after doing so."

Tusna was a bit hesitant but followed the order again. He could feel his throat burning after drinking tequila. He observed with amazement how quickly Xanxus emptied his glass. The varia boss didn't even bother with salt and lemon. "Wow. How could you drink it so easily?"

"Practice."

Xanxus proceeded to pour himself another glass. The silence between then was a bit awkward, so Tsuna decided to initiate the conversation. He pointed to the old-fashioned guns that were hanging on the wall in a showcase. "They look awesome. Are they real?"

"_Of course_ they're not. Your trash of a father took all my real guns."

Tsuna thought that perhaps guns weren't the most fortunate topic. He decided to try something more neutral. "Have you ever liked a girl?"

Xanxus, who was pouring himself yet another glass, looked at Tsuna suspiciously. "Why are you asking me this?"

"N-no particular reason. I'm just curios."

"The answer is no. I've never liked anyone."

Tsuna was quite willing to believe it. But he decided to explore the topic a bit more. "And if there was a girl that you liked?"

"What question is that? She'd become mine."

Tsuna suspected that such girl would become Xanxus' whether she wanted it or not. Still, he had to admit it that he was a bit jealous of Xanxus' self-confidence. If he had at least one tenth of it, he'd be able to finally confess to Kyoko. His contemplations were interrupted when Xanxus suddenly spoke. "Come to think of it, trash, you look a lot like a girl."

Tsuna was completely taken aback. He wondered if Xanxus was already drunk. "E-excuse me?"

"And you even sound like one too."

With an astonishing speed Xanxus cornered Tsuna and pinned him to the wall. The boy couldn't help trembling. "From near, you look even more girly, trash. Maybe I should remove your clothes to make sure that you aren't really a woman…"

Just as Tsuna was nearly passing out from fear, Xanxus laughed. "Puahaha! You should see your face now, trash! You look as if you were to drop dead!"

Xanxus released Tsuna and returned to drinking tequila. Half of the bottle was already empty. The boy sighed with relief that it was only a joke. He didn't really appreciate Xanxus' peculiar sense of humor but it was still better than having a cheesecake thrown at your face.


	9. Chapter 9

**_Author's note_**

I've got two news for you, dear readers. The good one is that my sister promised to still help me with the story. The bad one is that she has even less time than before, so the updates won't be regular. Up until now I tried to post a new chapter at least weekly but now it may take a bit longer. I hope you don't mind. As I once said, life can be time-consuming ;)

* * *

It didn't take Xanxus too long to empty the tequila bottle. After he finished he threw it at Tsuna. "Bring me another bottle, trash."

Tsuna looked at the varia boss somewhat doubtful. "Ummm…Are you sure?"

"Stop asking stupid questions and just bring it."

Tsuna decided that Xanxus must have an extraordinary alcohol tolerance as he seemed mostly sober. The boy sighed and headed for the door with the intention to ask Ida for another bottle. To his surprise, after he opened the door, he saw his father. "Hello, Tsuna! Reborn told me I'll find you here!"

"What are you doing here, father?"

"Is that tequila? Xanxus, didn't I tell you not to make Tsuna drink alcohol?"

Xanxus gave Iemitsu a glare full of contempt. "I don't take orders from you."

Iemitsu thought that Timoteo got the opposite effect to what he was really intending. Instead of Tsuna having a good influence on Xanxus, it was the latter having a bad influence on the former. He sighed and spoke. "But you _do_ take orders from the ninth, right Xanxus? He wants to see both you and Tsuna."

"What does that old fart want?"

Iemitsu resisted the temptation to give the disrespectful brat before him a good hiding and answered the question. "Apparently, there are some problems with Macchina Family."

"Tch. So, he wants us to eradicate those weak trash."

Tsuna wasn't too happy to hear that. He didn't feel like fighting anyone or meddling in mafia affairs. Contrary to him, Xanxus barely concealed his enthusiasm. It's been awhile since he killed someone and he was feeling a bit out of form. As a result he eagerly followed Iemitsu while Tsuna reluctantly dragged along behind them. On their way to the ninth's office they saw Bianchi, Haru and Ida. The former was giving some sort of lecture to the other two. Tsuna overheard a part of it. "If it's for love, someone can die." The boy facepalmed. Bianchi was probably the last person to ask for a love advice.

Timoteo smiled warmly when saw his adopted son. "It's been a long time, Xanxus. You're looking well."

Xanxus narrowed his eyes spitefully, not even trying to hide his distaste. "Spare me that bullshit, old man. Just get to the point."

The ninth looked at Xanxus somewhat sadly but he proceeded to explain. "Two of my guardians were attacked by the members of Macchina family."

"Then send your other guardians to aid them. Those Macchina trash are so weak that even they should be able to cope with it."

Tsuna was quite sure that Xanxus made that remark just to spite his father. Timoteo sighed and continued. "My other guardians are on leave, so it's an emergency situation. Besides, you and Tsunayoshi-kun are the only ones that can get there fast enough."

"Aren't you forgetting something, old man? I can't fly with these on." Xanxus pointed to the restraints. In response the ninth took out a pair of x-guns and a small electronic device with a single button. He handed them to Tsuna. "I'm leaving it to you, Tsunayoshi-kun."

"Huh, me? What I'm supposed to do with them?"

"Here's the map with the location. Now please hurry."

Xanxus glanced briefly at the map. Then he grabbed Tsuna by the collar and started dragging him away. The boy tried to protest. "Hey, let me go!"

Xanxus released him abruptly. "There is no time to waste, trash. Give me back my guns and deactivate those shitty restraints."

"But do you promise not to kill me?"

In response Xanxus grabbed Tsuna's neck. He tightened the grip just enough to inflict pain but still not tight enough to strangle the poor boy to death. He spoke in an icy tone. "If I wanted to kill you, you'd be already dead, trash."

Tsuna was released and he coughed violently while massaging his bruised neck. Eventually he spoke. "Fine, you convinced me. Here are your guns. I'll deactivate the restraints immediately."

Xanxus took the guns and smiled as they started glowing. For a moment Tsuna thought that they would be fired them at him but the varia boss soared into the air. The boy took the dying will pill and quickly followed him. He asked. "Is it far from here?"

"Not far."

Indeed, they soon saw a pair of men in black suits being attacked by 10 people in what looked like some sort of mechanical armors. Xanxus started loading his guns but Tsuna grabbed him at his waist to stop him. "Wait! If you shot them, the guardians might get hurt too!"

Xanxus frowned obviously displeased. "Do you have a better idea, trash?"

Tsuna thought about it for a moment. "I'll freeze the attackers that are the nearest. You'll do the rest."

Xanxus nodded albeit reluctantly. Tsuna suspected that he wouldn't mind burning the guardians along with the attackers but he said nothing. Instead he started to release his flames and flew to the nearest man in the armor. A one touch was enough and the man froze almost instantly. Next he froze two others who tried to attack him. The rest was shot by Xanxus. Fortunately for them, the armors protected them from certain death but they still required medical treatment. The only ones left standing were the two guardians. The first one of them was an elderly man wearing glasses. The second one was middle-aged with mixed hair. Xanxus landed and smiled mockingly to them. "Aren't you shitty guardians? Not only you can't protect your boss but you can't even protect yourselves. You're the lowest of the trash."

"How dare you, Xanxus!"

The younger one of the guardians wanted to go at Xanxus but the older one stopped him. "Calm down, Ganauche. This brat isn't worth it."

Ganauche looked at smiling Xanxus grudgingly but he obeyed. The elderly man spoke to Tsuna. "You must be Sawada Tsunayoshi-sama? My name is Visconti. I want to thank you for your help."

"Not at all. Aren't you hurt?"

"No, thanks to you. I'll give my report to the ninth imminently. Ganauche will take care of them."

Visconti pointed to the laying men in the armors. Tsuna nodded. Soon the guardians walked away taking the members of Macchina family along with them. Xanxus spoke to Tsuna. "Aren't you going to activate those shitty restraints?"

In response Tsuna smiled and handed him the device. "There is no need. You can have it."

Xanxus looked at him questioningly. Tsuna answered. "You said that you could've killed me all this time but you didn't. So there is no need for those restraints. I trsut you."

Xanxus gave Tsuna a strange look but he took the device. He burned it almost instantly with his flame of rage. Soon the restraints followed it. A smile appeared on his face. A smile that made Tsuna shiver. Xanxus spoke. "You're too soft, trash."

And then he burst into an insane laughter. "BWAHAHA! NOW THERE IS NOTHING TO STOP ME! DIE!"

A flame of rage formed on his palm. Tsuna shrieked and cringed. "Hiiiie!"

Xanxus' flame disappeared and he squatted next to trembling Tsuna. "Oy, trash, I was just joking. Move your ass, we got to go back."

Tsuna thought that he would never get fully used to Xanxus' sense of humor.


	10. Chapter 10

**_Author's note_**

This chapter sure took long to update. Unfortunately I can't guarantee that the next ones will appear faster. Unless my sister breaks up with her boyfriend, that is. ;)

* * *

The next day Tsuna wake up in his new (and quite comfortable) bed. "My, yesterday was such a tiring day…" He sat up and rubbed his still sleepy eyes when he saw a small figure before him. "Reborn! What are you going to do with this stuff?"

The miniature hitman quickly hid a defibrillator he was holding just a second ago. "I was going to use the vongola's traditional method to wake you up. But there is no need for it anymore since you're already awake."

"Were you going to wake me up or kill me?"

"Today you're supposed to train with Xanxus. Go and fetch him."

"Don't change the subject like that! And how I'm supposed to fetch him?"

"I heard you two finally started getting along, so it should be simple. Just go to his room, wake him up and tell him to come to the training hall."

Tsuna sighed. "I can't wake him up. You said it yourself that he's a very heavy sleeper. No matter how much I tried my voice will never be as loud as Squalo's."

In response Reborn smiled and took out the defibrillator again. "Then use this."

"I don't want to kill him! Or get myself killed in the process either!"

Reborn unceremoniously kicked Tsuna out of the bed. "In that case, think of something else, no-good Tsuna! I want to see both you and Xanxus in the training hall at ten. Don't be late or I'll…"

Reborn took out the gun. There was a dangerous glint in his eye. Tsuna cringed. "Hiii! All right, I'll do it!"

The boy quickly took shower and changed his clothes. Then he reluctantly headed for Xanxus' room. He wasn't sure whether he would be able to wake up the varia boss and survive. He knocked at the door and unsurprisingly no one answered him. Tsuna sighed and entered.

What the boy saw inside made his already big eyes grow to the size of extremely large saucers. In Xanxus' bed there was an attractive, black-haired girl. And she was even wearing the varia boss' pajamas (that were several sizes too big for her). Tsuna stood there gaping at her unable to do anything. Xanxus himself was nowhere to be seen. Finally the boy made the decision. He moved silently towards the door. He was quite sure that the varia boss rather wouldn't want to be bothered by him in such a situation. Just before he left, his intuition told him to look at the girl once more.

She changed the position and was now laying on her back. Thick, messy black hair were no longer covering the left side of her face. Tsuna's eyes grew even bigger. "Wait, what! Why does she have identical scar to Xanxus?"

The boy took a better look at the girl. Now her face seemed awfully familiar. She had tawny skin, her black eyebrows split at the ends and on her forehead there was a similar scar to the one on her cheek just smaller. A terrible realization dawned at Tsuna. "Ummm, Xanxus?"

To the boy's surprise the girl slowly opened her eyes. Accidentally they were dark red. She yawned and stretched lazily. Then she looked questioningly at Tsuna. "What?"

"Is that you?"

"Who else would it be, trash? And why are you staring at me like that?"

"Ummm….Well…I…"

"The hell? Spit it out!"

Only then Xanxus realized something was wrong. Since when were his pajamas that big? And his palms that small? He quickly got up and looked at himself in the mirror. It was smashed to pieces almost instantly. Tsuna watched in horror as the girl was bleeding from her fist. "Where. Is. Your. Shitty. Tutor?"

"Hiii! I don't know!"

"Find him! Now!"

"Yes!"

Still shaking the boy run out of the room. It was quite obvious to him that Reborn was responsible for all this. Tsuna quickly recalled the events of the previous day.

_Just as __Tsuna__ and __Xanxus__ returned to the __vongola__ headquarters after protecting the ninth's guardians, they saw Reborn waiting for them at the bottom of the stairs. "Good work, no-good __Tsuna__. I've got a present for you."_

_The tutor took out the gun and pointed it at the boy. __Tsuna__ tried to protest. "W-wait, don't shoot me!"_

_But it was already too late and Reborn fired the gun. But __Tsuna__ unintentionally tripped and fell down the stairs. The bullet missed him and hit __Xanxus__ who was standing right behind the boy. The __varia__ boss __was shot__ in the forehead and fell on his back. He laid there seemingly lifeless. Horrified __Tsuna__ quickly run to him. "__Xanxus__ are you okay?"_

_Luckily __Xanxus__ winced in pain and slowly stood up while holding his now aching head. He gave Reborn a truly terrifying death glare. "I'll eradicate you for that, trash!"_

_But Reborn ignored him altogether and looked at his gun with discontent. "That __Giannini__! His invention didn't work again! I'll have to take care of him!"_

_Fortunately for him, Reborn managed to disappear before __Xanxus__' bullets could reach him. But there __was burnt__ ground in the place he stood just a second ago. For the second time this day __Tsuna__ grabbed __Xanxus__' waist trying to pacify him. "Please calm down! Nothing happened to you, right?"_

_Xanxus__ looked at __Tsuna__ with distaste but he lowered his guns. Then he spoke. "Go report to that old fart, trash. I don't feel like talking to him now."_

_The boy nodded obediently and watched as __Xanxus__ walked away._

Tsuna facepalmed. "Just what was Reborn trying to do? Turn me into a woman?"

"Good morning, juudaimee!"

"Hello there, Tsuna."

Tsuna looked at Gokudera and Yamamoto in resignation. "Hi. Have you seen Reborn?"

"He told us he'll be waiting for you in the training hall. But more importantly, juudaimee! That baseball idiot told me that Xanxus became your subordinate! Is that true?"

"Well, yes. Supposedly. But actually I'm the one being ordered around."

"That bastard!"

"Ma, ma. Isn't it good that they're getting along?"

"Sorry guys, but I can't talk with you any longer! I'll have to go and find Reborn quickly or something bad will happen!"

Tsuna ran in the training hall with his two friends closely following him. But there was no one inside. The boy started panicking. "Reborn isn't here! What do I do?"

"Don't worry juudaime!"

"We'll help you look for Reborn, Tsuna!"

"Thank you, Gokudera-kun, Yamamoto!"

The three boys split up and went to search for Reborn in different parts of Vongola mansion. Eventually Tsuna was able to find his tutor enjoying an espresso in the kitchen. "What are you doing here, Reborn? I've been looking for you everywhere!"

"It was taking you too long, so I decided to take a coffee break. Where is Xanxus?"

"Your bullet changed him into a woman!"

"Really? So it _did_ work. I've beaten Giannini unnecessarily."

In the meantime Xanxus tried to get dressed and was swearing viciously in the process. The fact that his clothes were now several sizes too big for him wouldn't be so bad, if he could button up the shirt on his new and rather ample chest. He swore once again when he heard a sunny voice. "I've brought your breakfast, Xanxus-sama."

Ida placed the tray on the table and glanced at Xanxus. Just like Tsuna's not so long ago her eyes enlarged to the size of saucers. "What happened?"

"Nothing. Stop staring at me like that and bring me some woman's clothes."

Ida complied with the order rather quickly. She brought Xanxus a black suit similar to the one he was previously wearing but designed for women. Xanxus noted with content that it fitted him quite well. When he finished dressing he noticed that the maid didn't leave the room. "Are you still here, woman?"

In response Ida blushed and started twiddling her index fingers. "I've got one big request, Xanxus-sama…"

"What is it?"

The maid took the camera out. "May I be allowed to take a picture?"

Xanxus raised an eyebrow in a mixture of irritation and disbelief but after some consideration he (now she) nodded.


	11. Chapter 11

**_Author's note_**

I'm so very sorry for such a long delay. I know it's been a month already. I'm trying my best, I swear! It's just that between school, part-time job and nagging my sister, I have so little free time…

* * *

"What gotten into you, Reborn? Why did you want to turn me into a girl?"

"It was the ninth's idea."

"Eeeh? What? It was Grandpa's?"

Tsuna looked at his smiling tutor with disbelief. The latter continued. "He said: 'It's such a pity that Tsunayoshi-kun isn't a girl. He would make a great wife for Xanxus."

"It's impossible!"

"It's the truth. But not everything is lost. Since Xanxus is now a woman you two could still marry."

"Are you joking, Reborn? That's the last thing I'd do!"

"Why? Is Xanxus not pretty as a girl?"

"No, quite contrary…But that's not the point!"

In the meanwhile Xanxus got annoyed and left her room with the aim of searching for Tsuna and his tutor (and also killing the latter). Just as she stepped into the corridor, she bumped into no one else but her second-in-command. "VOIII! WATCH WHERE YOU'RE GOING, GIRLIE!"

Squalo was quite surprised when said "girlie" punched him so hard that he hit the floor. He took a good look at her and blinked several times. He recognized those scars and fierce red eyes. "BOSS? IS THAT YOU?"

"The hell are you here again, trash-shark?"

"VOOII! I JUST WANTED TO REPORT!"

"Report _what_?"

"SOME LOWER RANKS WERE TRYING TO REBEL WHEN YOU'RE GONE BUT IT'S BEEN ALREADY TAKEN CARE OF!"

Xanxus wondered why his second-in-command couldn't come up with better excuse. She was in a really bad mood, so she punched Squalo again. "If it's been already taken care of, then couldn't you wait with the report till I return?"

"SORRY FOR THAT, BOSS! BUT TELL ME, WHY ARE YOU LOOKING LIKE THAT?"

"It's that shitty arcobaleno's doing. I need to find him."

"VOOOI! CAN I HELP?"

Xanxus didn't answer and just shrugged her arms, so Squalo took it as 'yes'. He closely followed his now-female boss. When they left the corridor, they run into Yamamoto. The boy smiled cheerfully when he saw varia's second-in-command. "Squalo! Nice to see you again. And who is that pretty girl? A girlfriend of yours?"

A vein popped out on Squalo's temple. "VOOOII, BRAT! ARE YOU FUCKING BLIND? CAN'T YOU SEE IT'S XANXUS?"

Yamamoto took a look at Squalo's companion and laughed with embarrassment. "Hahaha. Now I see. Sorry for that, Xanxus. Last time I saw you, you looked a bit different."

The girl shot Yamamoto an icy glare. "Where is that Sawada trash?"

"Tsuna? He went to the left wing to search for Rebo…"

Yamamoto didn't manage to finish his sentence since he was interrupted by the sudden arrival of Gokudera. "It's you varia! What do you want from juudaime?"

Xanxus passed the grey-haired boy without saying a word and headed for the left wing. Squalo quickly followed her.

"Hey! What are you doing, you bastard?"

"I think sh…I mean he's ignoring you, Gokudera."

Meanwhile, Tsuna couldn't hide his indignation at his tutor's words. "How could you think about something like that, Reborn? First of all I like Kyoko! Secondly I highly doubt that Xanxus would ever agree to marry me!"

Reborn smiled slyly. "If the ninth ordered him to do so, he wouldn't have any choice."

Tsuna paled. "Grandpa wouldn't do something like that…"

"It depends. If he believed that it would improve his son's personality…"

"We have to change him back!"

"Then you have to talk to Giannini. He was the one who made the bullet."

Tsuna wanted to ask Reborn where to find the inventor but his tutor suddenly disappeared. There was a burnt hole on the table that he was sitting just a second ago. The boy caught a glimpse of Reborn's black fedora disappearing behind the window, so he guessed that the arcobaleno managed to get away. He turned over just to see a very angry girl with a gun in her hand. "Where is that Giannini trash?"

"I didn't manage to ask Reborn about that before you shot him…"

"You're completely useless, trash."

"Hey, you bastard! Stop insulting juudaimee!"

"VOOII! YOU BETTER STOP INSULTING THE BOSS, BRAT!"

"Ma ma. It's all right. It was just a friendly talk, right, Tsuna?"

Only then Tsuna saw that behind Xanxus there were Squalo, Gokudera and Yamamoto. The boy sighed. He just hoped they wouldn't make much trouble. "Do any of you know where to find Giannini?"

Squalo needed a second to think. "IF I'M NOT MISTAKEN, HIS WORKSHOP SHOULD BE SOMEWHERE NEAR THE HEADQUARTERS!"

Xanxus looked at him. "Where?"

"I DON'T KNOW EXACT…OUCHHH! WHAT WAS THAT FOR?"

"Stupid, useless shark."

Tsuna felt nothing but sympathy for Squalo. Apparently, varia's second-in-command had even harder time with Xanxus than him. Just as he was losing any hope, he heard a pleasant voice. "Excuse me, but I accidentally overheard your conversation. Are you looking for Giannini-sama?"

Tsuna saw the familiar maid and smiled with joy. "Ida-san! Do you know where we can find Giannini?"

"Of course. I visited his workshop several times. I can draw you a map, if you'd like."

"Thank you very much!"

Just as Tsuna and the others were leaving the kitchen, Ida smiled and waved them goodbye. "I'll always treasure that picture, Xanxus-sama!"

VOII! WHAT PICTURE? OUCHH!"

"Not your fucking business."

Truthfully to Squalo's words, Gainnini's workshop wasn't situated too far away. With the help of the map they were able to get there quite quickly. Feeling that Xanxus' anger was growing, Tsuna hesitantly knocked at the door. Giannini opened it and smiled at the boy. "Greetings, juudaimee. How may I serve you?"

But Giannini's smile quickly disappeared just to be replaced by terrified look when he saw who was accompanying Tsuna. Xanxus unceremoniously burst into the workshop, grabbed Giannini and shook him not too gently. "Did you make the bullet that changes gender, trash?"

"I did but it was just a prototype! Reborn-sama promised to test it for me!"

Tsuna was afraid that Xanxus might lose her temper and kill Giannini, so he moved between them to ensure the latter's safety and spoke to him. "Is there any way to cancel its effect?"

"I haven't tried that yet! I wasn't even sure it worked until now! Please don't kill me, Xanxus-sama!"

Only then Gokudera decided to cut in. "If I understood correctly that bullet changes gender, right? So all you need to do is shot Xanxus with it again and he should return to normal."

"VOIII! THAT BRAT IS RIGHT!"

Tsuna was overjoyed that they finally found a solution (and that he'd escape possible marriage) but Giannini dispelled his hopes. "I had only one such bullet. Creating another would take months."

Xanxus pointed her gun at him. "You'd better do it quicker, trash!"

"I'll get down to work immediately, Xanxus-sama!"


	12. Chapter 12

**_Author's note_**

Fortunately I managed to update this chapter a bit quicker than the previous one. And guess what – my sister _did_ break up with her boyfriend. But they parted on friendly terms, so it's not so bad ;) Anyway, she promised to help me finish this story (and to aid me with writing another one that I'm planning to publish soon). I hope she'll keep her word. She usually does.

* * *

They returned from Giannini's workshop in rather somber moods. Tsuna hoped that it wouldn't take too long to make another gender-changing bullet. Otherwise the ninth might get the "wonderful" idea to force him to marry Xanxus. But after some consideration the boy thought that maybe it wouldn't be so bad. After all, as a girl Xanxus was far from being unattractive. Although violent, bad-tempered girls that were one head taller than him were not exactly Tsuna's type…

Squalo wasn't too happy either. To him the change in his boss' appearance didn't make that much of a difference but he could imagine the reaction of the rest of varia members. He was sure that they would find it quite "distracting" at the very least. And it worried him. Greatly.

Xanxus' mood wasn't so bad considering the situation she was in. It was all due to Squalo's presence since she at least could take her frustration out on him. The only things that were presently bothering her was the backache caused by her new, ample chest and the fact that she was getting hungry.

Gokudera was discontented that his juudaime was spending so much time with Xanxus. He knew it was the ninth's order but he still didn't like it. Besides, he could tell that the varia bastard didn't treat his juudaime with due respect. The fact that Xanxus was now a woman made it even worse in Gokudera's opinion.

Yamamoto was thinking about his approaching baseball match. It worried him a little that he wasn't training enough. He wondered whether Squalo or Gokudera would agree to play with him and decided to ask them about it later.

Soon after they reached the main hall they saw Ida who tried to run away from someone. "I'm really not interested, signor!"

Then Tsuna and the others heard a familiar voice. "Please wait, mademoiselle! Let's go on a date!"

"I said NO!"

With a surprising speed Ida took out a rolling pin, that she kept hidden under her dress, and used it to struck the man that was harassing her. Then she quickly ran away. The man hit the ground but he recovered briefly and stood up. "My, she's so shy."

"Doctor Shamal!"

"Oh, it's you. Long time no see."

"What are you doing in Italy?"

"I should ask you the sam…but wait! Who is that bella signorina?"

Shamal fixed his eyes on Xanxus. In response the latter glared at him but it didn't discourage the doctor from getting near her. "Your eyes are red as wine. How about going on a drink with me?"

"Get lost, trash."

"My, another shy one. Then how abo…"

Shamal didn't manage to finish his sentence since Xanxus punched him so hard that he hit the ground. He recovered just as quickly as from Ida's strike. "You're fierce! I always liked women with temperament!"

"Then you'll surely like this."

A flame of rage appeared on Xanxus' palm. Both Tsuna and Squalo reacted instinctively. "Wait Xanxus! Don't use it here!"

"BOSS! DON'T USE IT HERE!"

Both tried to restrain Xanxus but both accidentally grabbed her by the chest. And both earned punches to their faces.

"Do you want to die, you fucking scums?"

Shamal observed the scene in astonishment. "Did you call her Xanxus? My, I'd never say that a guy like you would be so good at cross-dressing."

"HE'S NOT CROSS-DRESSING, YOU IDIOT!"

"Now that you mention it those two beauties look quite real. May I touch them?"

"VOOII! I'LL KILL YOU SCUM!"

Shamal avoided Squalo's blade quite swiftly. Then he turned to Gokudera. "What actually happened here, Hayato?"

"Xanxus was shot with gender-changing bullet."

"My, is there really a miraculous bullet like that? Where can I get it?"

"Stop joking! It's causing problems for juudaimee! Do you have a cure that could change him back?"

Shamal needed a second to think. "Possibly. One of my mosquitoes carries a disease that changes gender. But there are some possible side-effects."

Xanxus glared at him. "What side-effects?"

"It varies from person to person. But they're temporary."

Xanxus nodded. "Do it, trash." She flinched when Shamal was instantly all around her. "I don't usually attend to men. But I can make an exception. Just let me smooch you!"

"Smooch that."

Xanxus stuck one of her guns in Shamal's mouth. Tsuna and the others thought that the doctor must've been very brave or very stupid. But Shamal was reasonable enough to slightly move away. "Fine, fine, I'll do it. Just hold still."

He took out a small, white box and released one of his mosquitoes. "Go! Trident Mosquito!"

The mosquito sat at Xanxus' palm and drank her blood. Then she started changing. But contrary to what everyone were expecting to see she was getting smaller and smaller. Eventually before them stood a very small and very angry boy in an oversized, white shirt.

"VOOII, XANXUS! IT'S NOT SO BAD! IT'S ONLY TEMPORARY REMEMBER!"

But Tsuna could see that Squalo's attempt to placate Xanxus ended in vain. The boy ground his teeth and shouted. "I'LL KILL ALL OF YOU FUCKING TRASH!"

A flame appeared on the boy's small hand. Just as everyone were saying goodbye to their lives, all of a sudden appeared no one else but Bianchi. She was carrying two full plates. She threw one of them at Xanxus.

"Here eat this."

The boy fell to the ground with his face all blue due to having a contact with poison cooking. Gokudera also fell down but due to slightly different reasons. Squalo didn't take mistreating his boss too well. "VOOII, BITCH! WHAT DID YOU TO HIM?"

Bianchi looked at him unmoved by the blade he was pointing at her. "That kid was throwing a tantrum, so I thought he's hungry."

"YOU'LL PAY ME FOR THAT!"

"Be quiet!"

Just before Squalo could do anything Bianchi threw the second plate at him. The results were quite predictable and varia's second in command fell to the ground lifelessly. Yamamoto observed that scene in amazement. "Wow! Biachi sure is strong! She took both Squalo and Xanxus so easily! It's a shame that she didn't fight with us during the ring battles!"

Contrary to Yamamoto, Tsuna observed everything with twitching eyebrow. He wondered how much of that madness he could take.

Bianchi saw her little brother laying on the floor, so she decided to check on him but Shamal stopped her halfway. "It's been so long, Biachi-chan! How about a kiss?"

"Stay away!"

Bianchi threw three poison pizzas at the doctor but he evaded them easily and chased her out. Tsuna sighed heavily and turned to Yamamoto. "Could you take care of Gokudera and Squalo? I'll deal with Xanxus."

Yamamoto smiled a sunny smile "Sure."


	13. Chapter 13

**_Author's note_**

I know it's been quite a while, dear readers (a month to be precise). My only excuse is that I didn't think that studying and working part-time can be so exhausting. When I return home, I usually don't have enough strength to do anything, let alone write. It's a good thing that I finally got several free days. As a result you receive this chapter :) Though I have to apologize for its shortness :(

* * *

Tsuna cautiously lifted unconscious Xanxus. He was rather surprised to discover that the little boy weighted not much more than Lambo despite being quite taller. Evidently Xanxus as a child was just skin and bones. Tsuna intended to carry him to his room but in the corridor he came across vongola's ninth. "Good day, Tsunayoshi-kun. How are you doing? I hope my son doesn't cause you much trouble?"

Tsuna shook his head a bit too quickly. "No, of course not!"

In response, Timoteo smiled. "I know you aren't telling my the whole truth. But I'm still happy that you two are getting along. I know better than anyone that he can be difficult at times…"

He paused when he noticed the child who was resting in Tsuna's arms. "My, what an adorable boy. He's just like Xanxus when he was little…"

"E-excuse me grandpa, but I have to go now! Bye!"

Tsuna didn't exactly know how to explain everything to the ninth, so he decided it was better to leave. Too bad that almost immediately after meeting Timoteo, he ran into another person who he didn't really want to encounter. "Hahi! He's sooo cute desu!"

If Tsuna wasn't currently holding Xaunxus, he would probably facepalm when he saw his self-proclaimed future-wife. Haru's eyes shone with excitement but the boy didn't share her delight. "I'm in a hurry, Haru, so if you excu…"

"Who is that cute baby, Tsuna-san? He looks a lot like that cousin of yours. What was his name? Xanus? Don't tell me…"

Tsuna was afraid what Haru might say. "…Don't tell me, that he has a little brother?"

"Errr, yes, that how it is."

"Hahi! I just hope that he's not like his older brother! That nasty pervert!"

Tsuna gave up entirely on explaining Haru that the varia's boss, despite all his faults, wasn't exactly perverted. He just sighed and headed for Xanxus' room. Haru followed him with a happy smile.

Tsuna carefully placed Xanxus in his bed. Now it seemed ridiculously big for him. He also noticed the little boy's face was a bit pale but it had no longer that unhealthy bluish tint. Xanxus slowly opened his red eyes and looked at Tsuna and then at Haru. "It's you, dumb woman. Bring me something to eat."

"Hahi! How rude! Did your older brother teach you that?"

Xanxus looked at the girl in confusion but Tsuna quickly cut in. "He hasn't eaten since morning, so it's normal he's hungry, Haru. Could you please go to kitchen and bring him something for dinner?"

"Okay, Haru will do it!"

When the girl left Xanxus looked at Tsuna questioningly. "What the hell were you telling your dumb girlfriend about me, trash?"

"Haru isn't my girlfriend! And I didn't tell her anything! But more importantly, how are you feeling now?"

Tsuna's question visibly unnerved Xanxus who replied rather angrily. "And what do you think, trash? I feel like shit. It's even worse than being woman. But why a trash like you would care?"

This time it was Tsuna who was unnerved. "I _do_ care! So do your father, Squalo and Ida-san! I bet that all those bad things happen to you because of how you treat people that care about you!"

"Don't give me that karma shit."

Maybe it was because Xanxus as a child didn't seem so scary to Tsuna, the boy managed to talk back. "It wouldn't hurt you, if you tried to be nice for a change! Why are you so angry at everyone?"

"You've no right to lecture me, trash. What someone like _you_ would know? And you're saying that they care? What a bullshit."

"It's true that I don't know how it's to be adopted but…"

Their discussion was interrupted by a sudden return of Haru who was carrying a tasty-looking steak on a plate. "Pom pom pom! Haru brought you a filet mignon! Ida-san told me it's your favorite!"

To Tsuna's surprise Xanxus devoured the steak in a blink of an eye. Haru also observed it in awe and even patted the little boy on the head. "You surely have a healthy appetite!"

Tsuna was afraid that Haru might get herself killed but luckily the varia boss restricted himself to death-glaring at her. In other circumstances Tsuna might've even found it funny. After finishing his meal Xanxus yawned and returned to bed. "I want to sleep. Leave now trash."

"Hahi! You shouldn't follow your older brother's example! It's very rude to call people dumb or trash!"

"The hell are you talking about, woman? All my older brothers are dead."

"Hahi? What?"

"He's tired, Haru. We'd better leave him now."

Haru nodded but her face still showed signs of confusion. Before they left Tsuna wished Xanxus good sleep. Unsurprisingly for him, he didn't receive any answer. After the door closed behind them Haru decided to ask a question. "Haru doesn't understand. Tsuna-san said that this cute, little boy is his cousin's little brother. But now he says that all his older brothers are dead?"

Tsuna sighed. He had enough lies for today, so he decided to tell the truth this time. "Actually this little boy is Xanxus. He was shot by a gender-changing bullet, so we asked Doctor Shamal to cure him but the cure had some side-effects and he turned into a child. By the way, he isn't my really my cousin. We aren't even blood-related."

Haru looked at Tsuna and blinked several times. "Haru still doesn't understand."

"I know. It's a bit complicated. Anyway, let's go find Gokudera. He wasn't feeling too well when I saw him last time."


End file.
